Last Sunday I published chapter 6 of my Legend of Zelda - Ocarina of Time interpretation. You can find it on my main site or at my Scribd account (http://www.scribd.com/MayaPosch). Last night I published another short story, titled In Between and Neither, which is also available at my Scribd account.
Last night I felt like writing, yet when I was about to start on this other novel I'm preparing it suddenly hit me that it wasn't what I wanted to write about. When I thought about what to write about then, I came up with the idea for In Between and Neither, which I wrote in less than four hours. Yes, that's about one hour per page :P
Today I had some people say that they were looking forward to reading the next chapter of this story, yet I didn't intend it to become more than what it is right now. Still, it made me think about the possibility of making it into more, to make it a longer story. Since it is based on my own life, there are certain limitations involved, such as not being able to create an ending until the same happens in reality, but there are still things I could write about. Assuming the demand really is there, of course :)
The thing for me is that while I like to write, I have to know that it is being read. After all that's why I'm doing it.
In other news, it's 40 days until my appointment at the UMCG hospital, or 1 month and 10 days. I'm not really sure I feel anything when I think about it any more, or at least not consciously. What can I say or think, really? The second chapter of my In Between and Neither story basically sums it all up, I am struggling to ascribe some worth to my own existence and somehow value my own body instead of giving in to the pressure and just condemn myself as a freakish mistake of nature which should be corrected right away.
I'm not a mistake, it's actually a pretty common occurrence, it's just that modern society can't deal with anything other than this black/white view of male and female and absolutely can not tolerate anything beyond it. Heck, it's why transsexuals are generally tolerated; because they don't torn at this illusion. It's why people like me are a taboo, even if I do meet people who accept me as I am.
There are so many things I want to do and accomplish in this life, yet this burden I have been given of a body which is a taboo in society is a heavy one indeed. When I say that I do not belong in society, I'm not really kidding. The thing is that society doesn't tolerate those who places themselves outside the 'natural' order, ergo I'm not part of this order, and thus not of society.
What does this mean, concretely? I don't have the faintest clue...