Today was a nightmarish experience, courtesy of someone I mistakenly ever gave my trust and who abused it to the fullest extent possible. As I posted on Google+ and Facebook earlier today:
"Well, so I went back to the apartment today to get my stuff and it's all gone. My mom and I also got assaulted by the ex-housemate. We had to call in the police just so that I could look around the place to see whether anything was left. Virtually nothing.
No idea what happened to it. Sold and destroyed is my guess. It means that I lost my full business and personal administration, my PCs, other equipment, all furniture, bicycle and far too many personal items of great emotional value to me.
Passing this all by my insurance company now. May get money to replace the replaceable items. Can never replace the items I treasured, some from a young age. At the end of the day all my mom and I have to show for this are scratches on our necks and a limp for my mom from the assault right after the door opened.
I just want to cry =/"
What I'm left with now are my old and new laptop and the clothes I bought after escaping the place earlier this year. That's all. The amount of items I lost is unimaginable. Though this person claims that it's 'stored somewhere', she refuses to say where. I have serious doubts whether that's true since lying comes so natural to her. The police officers I talked to recommended that I'd launch a full lawsuit against this person, which I intend to do. Such a heinous, despicable act deserves nothing less. This person even changed the lock on the apartment door without permission from the owner of the building, just so I couldn't get in any more.
Some people have already told me to consider it a 'fresh start'. No. Way. This is as much a fresh start as having your house burn down with every single of your possessions and valuables inside. Not only does this hit my company hard, it also means that everything of emotional value is gone. The lucky turtle I got from my friend Trevor. The angel doll I got from this nice lady at this talk show I was at last year. The Hello Kitty plushies and other gifts people sent me over the years. My music instruments. The game consoles. My electronics and soldering equipment. Every single last of my tools, some I got as a child. All gone.
I guess the natural response in this situation is to either grieve or be angry. For me it feels like mostly the first mixed with a whole lot of tiredness. After all I have gone through, this subhuman being goes and has to do one of the lowest possible things by destroying everything a person owns and treasures? Worse is that she also keeps pursuing me on the internet, stalking me and harassing not only me but others as well. It's a kind of sick obsession I just can not grasp. On one hand it's like she despises me, while on the other it's like she still wants me to love her.
I just want her and every single sick, twisted person like her to go away. It makes it impossible for me to enjoy life in any measure. If anything people like her drive me closer to just giving up on trying to build up an existence. If it's so easy to wipe away everything one builds up, one might as well not try...
Yes, I'm angry. And sickened. At least the scratches on my neck aren't hurting so much any more from where this person grabbed me by the throat today. I feel bad for my mom whose leg is really hurting now, though... she didn't deserve this.
I wish today never happened...